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Cass

Member Since 12 Jan 2007
Offline Last Active Nov 04 2012 02:50 PM
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Cass

A Paki buys the house next door to me. He asks me"Your front room is the same size as mine, how many rolls of wallpaper did you buy to decorate it?" I said "14" Saw him 3 days later he said" I have 4 rolls left over." I said "So have I."
Oct 13 2011 06:59 AM
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Cass

If cats always land on their feet, and toast always lands butter side down, what happens if you staple a piece of toast to the back of a cat with the butter side up and throw it out of a window? Perpetual motion?
Oct 08 2011 12:07 PM
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Cass

The sound of children laughing makes me happy. Unless I'm all alone in an abandoned hospital and my flash light isn't working properly.
Oct 04 2011 07:42 PM
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Cass

I was watching Family Fortunes and one of the questions was "Name an alcoholic spirit?" Should have seen the looks I got when I said George Best.
Sep 25 2011 08:10 PM
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Cass

I've had to change my relationship status on Facebook to 'It's complicated'... After breaking my right hand and having to wank with my left.
Sep 24 2011 06:48 AM
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Cass

Aberdeen officially does my tits clean in lol Canny wait to see the back of that place :)
Sep 23 2011 10:43 PM
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Cass

I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger :)
Sep 19 2011 09:38 PM
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Cass

I hate going to MC Hammer's house. He wont let me touch anything :(
Sep 18 2011 08:51 PM
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Cass

A Jehovah witness knocked on my door today and tried to convert me. I told him I wasn't interested in becoming a paedophile.
Sep 18 2011 12:47 PM